“Security Feels Me” (Song Parody by Rick London c2010) To The Tune Of The Who “See Me, Feel Me”

“Security..Feels Me” (Song Parody) by Rick London c2010 sung to The Who “See Me Feel Me”

 

Dedicated to my wife Lee Hiller-London

 

Security,
Feels me,
Sees me,
Perhaps a chablis?

More feelin’ me,
Squeeze me,
Frisk me,
Is this for free?

Suspicious Airline Passenger by Londons Times Cartoons

 

New York 80s sex bars weren’t even this sick,
You see me nude, now you’re in heat,
Normally, I’d spray with cayenne,
I’m just frequent flyer meat.

My behinds nude, guess you’ve seen millions,
Don’t you feel this is too gory,
Doesn’t matter if my fly’s open,
Go ahead with  your dirty deed.

All this time together, but we might not click,
This kind of behavior belongs ‘tween the sheets,
What’s on your face? Oh its a sick grin,
Wipe that excitement off your feet.

Hey stop that gawking at what you see jigglin’,
She’s no bomber, that’s just Aunt Bea,
Hang on to your yang it’s not going yin,
Let go of my flag, its not Old Glory.

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In addition to being a songwriter, Rick London is also f0under of Londons Times Cartoons, the #1 ranked offbeat cartoon on the Internet.  He also has opened numerous online shops that sell funny gifts bearing his cartoon images.  He also is founder and designer of the world’s only famous love quote shoes, Shoes That Amuse, and runs a cartoon blog about his various ventures. Follow him on Twitter @RickLondon.

We’ll Make It Right (By Rick London c2010) BP Song

We’ll Make It Right by Rick London c2010 Song Parody To the Tune of Manfred Mann’s “Blinded By The Light”

We’ll make it right, does BP think we’re all douche bags, the tv ads are getting trite,
We’ll make it right, we know its a ruse, BP attorneys prepping for a fight.
We’ll make it right. Tell that to the pelicans that can’t move, or fish that died in their plight.

Incompetent riggers cause emotional triggers, BP said 1000 barrels a day. We smelled a rat.

Even Halliburton Told-er but BP was feeling bolder, then drilled deep into the ocean ground

Then in a warm Gulf summer breeze, 11 men were nowhere to be found

Even though BP said Deep Horizone was surely sound.

They broke every law,
Their spilling greasy juice to the Gulf Coast was such a blight,
We’ll make it right. They said dispersants would make such a pretty sight.
We’ll make it right. Drilled in spite of engineer’s red light.
We’ll make it right. I’ve got a nifty British accent so you know I’m so polite.

BP’s got 10-minute trained skimmers, to get the oil off our dinner. Now we fish from rivers & lakes

BP might hang around & do right what they’ve done wrong, after all 20 billion’s at stake,
But don’t start feeling sorry, they don’t have to borrow, 2 billion a month is their take,
So Want My Life Back Hayward was feeling kind of wayward, and acting like he was sure on our side,
But with baby blues a cryin’, I’m tellin’ you Tony’s lyin’, he’s about to take us for more of a ride,

They say we must be….
Blinded by their lies, while they rot our labor’s fruits in the middle of the night,
We’ll make it right.

Maybe if we’re lucky Shell or Conoco/Phillips
Will acquire BP, before they fall out of sight.
To clean up this toxic waste site.

—— guitar solo ——

Maybe its time we get out of the oil biz,
And look for alternative energies like coconut fizz
Plumes of oil are all ove The Gulf thanks to the BP plumes
Please make it clean again from Florida to Louisiana and good Ole Ms.
We’ve got an addiction to 10W30 & its making air dirty & you know we must be released,
There are no rehab clinics, we’ve got to bear and grin it, and get rid of the ugly beast.
The resources are there, hybrid cars from here to France, we just need someone to finance,
It sounds so forlorn to rely on oil from corn but someone’s gotta give it a chance,
It’s clean and safe and no oil to muck around.

BP said they……
Will make things right…..they’ll put a bandaid on it and get on a British Airways flight.
We will make it right. And if you believe us we’ll sell you a rig at Grand Isle late one night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
{the following two sections are sung simultaneously}

(7 Times)) ~ We will make it right.~Every grain of sand will be whiter than white
~ We will make it right,

2) ~Repeat 1^st Verse

Any employee that squeals on BP will get fired

They’re using intimidation, fear and fright.

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Click To Enlarge

Rick London is a writer, designer and cartoonist.  He founded Londons Times Cartoons in 1997 which has been Google’s#1 ranked offbeat cartoon since 2005 and MSN’s #1 since 2008. Londons Times remains number one as do London’s offbeat cartoon gift shops.  London created this cartoon and manufactured about 40 products that can be purchased online. 10% of all sales benefit The Audobon Society and WWF.

“Twitter” Parody Song by Rick London c2010 To Tune Of “Money” Pink Floyd

For my Love/DF @LeeHiller

Pink Floyd Another Time, But We Still Love Them

Twitter, Play or Flay,
Midnight In The Garden Of Good & Evil On Monitor Display.
Listen, its not Ebay.

Twitter, answer before your browser crashes,
You could be labeled a non-response snob with no

MY D/F Love @LeeHiller (And It may sound funny, but she's gonna get her money back! A doo doo doo doo doo doo...

following or fans,

200,000 followers might be time to clean an extreme Twitter Stream,
Someone just RT’d me with the Hawaii 5-0 theme,

Danno got the money back
But not before someone hacked my Twitter profile,
Keep your hands off her stash CNN-Tech Guru, Uh oh, here comes a “Cap Attack”.

My honey, she got hit,
But she got right up from the mat,
And “the player” doesn’t know but he’s oon be laying flat.

We have this fidelity,
Boring pay our bills no debt,
A newspaper from Nepal asks me if “I have any regrets”.

The Nepal News

(Sax and guitar solos)

Tis the right seasonings, its about thyme,
See my fair @Lee
But don’t take a slice of that pie.

My honey, was at Ebay,
Is the Internet’s Dr. Eveel,
Now she has her own brand here to stay.

Twitters a great place 4 monthly lifetime ties,
If nothing else it proves that life’s unfair,
Piper must be paid,
A MidSummer’s Day,
A sewerage Day,
Or a Spiritual Bouquet,
Twitters here to stay.
A Salute to Ev and Biz,
We know them to be very bright and alright.

A Princess Shines At The Oscars (Our Kathy Ireland)!!!!

Biz & Ev Brainstorming At Twitter (So we'll be nervous)

One Princess at Oscars Red Carpet got a deliberate slight,
The princess gave a designer jewelry left hook & Governor’s Ball smashing blow & super high rankings (and had just help renew/rebuild lives in Haiti)… some nuts at keyboards are cruisin’ for a bruisin.
“Yeah!”
Whey do some forget to think,
I know, they are really drunk all of the time.
Why he wasn’t coming up on freely, after Lee was twittering in CAPS and
Screaming and telling him why he wasn’t coming up on freely.
It came as a heavy blow, but others to his surprise, will sort the matter out.

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Aside from being a parody songwriter Rick London is founder of the Internet’s #1 offbeat cartoon, Londons Times.  He also founded the world’s only famous love quote shoes, ShoesThatAmuse.com, and is a fashion brand designer for actress/author Mariel Hemingway Collectibles. Rick owns numerous licensed image cartoon collectible shops that sell tees, cards, mugs etc featuring his “out there” cartoons.

“12 Gauge Shotguns In National Parks” by Rick London (Sung to Chicago’s Saturday In The Park)

“12-Gauge Shotguns In National Parks” (by Rick London c2010) to the tune of Chicago’s “Saturday In The Park)

Dedicated to my DF/Love Lee Hiller who has a petition to keep loaded firearms out of National Parks which will be presented to the President 7 Congress. Please take a few moments to sign it. CLICK HERE TO SIGN.

12 gauge shotguns now legal in National Parks,
Face to face or even drive-by
Loaded shotguns in National Parks
NRA asked & Obama complied.
Will you get pinged by a zooming missile zing?
A Dick Cheney wet dream.
A farewell to life song.
Eicay varee’, eisee’ nardee’,
Where’s my case of Schlitz? (belch)
The one packing heat is sublime
Do we need semi-automatics to keep the beavers damned?

Now we’re safe from dawn until dark,
Now we’re safe from butterflies, or chipmunks that are on the sly.
Noah sailed on his ark,
The animals were all his allies,
People always smiled in the valley of Hot Springs,
The new laws a bit too bizarre,
The human is the only species here that mauls,
Bring a sick bag before I hurl,
Quick duck there’s a bullet,
How will our furry friends act with this new slime,
In my yard gun play..whose gonna pay?

Sloe gin guzzlers will turn my forest into a roadkill cafe,
I never thought I’d be betrayed by my home, the USA.
Ol’ Chevy trucks riding mountains with dual exhausts,
All is fair game at our cost, crow or doe.

So get out of the park, before it gets dark,
It’s bound to light up like Fourth Of July.
No more funny days in the park,
Just our wildlife with a bullseye mark.
The park is our back yard,
But he’s sick and wants it, really wants it,
His gun is so phallic,
There’s long been a place in hell for those who commit this crime,

Please stay out of my backyard and keep your gun at home,

I might not be as nice as Nurse Ratchett. Can you dig it?

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In addition to being a parody songwriter, Rick London is a writer with over 600 published articles to his name, the founder of Londons Times Cartoons which has been Google’s #1 ranked offbeat cartoon since 2005 luring 8.6 million people to his site, and has opened numerous web shops featuring over 100,000 of his cartoon image funny gifts. He is also brand designer for actress/author Mariel Hemingway at Hemingway Collectibles.

“Charge It” New Parody To Ray Charles “Georgia” By Rick London

“Charge It” to Ray Charles “Georgia” Song Parody by Rick London c2009

For my Df @LeeHiller

Charge it, Charge it,
Even when my Visa bill’s due,
And I know it’s wrong,
But charge it, and it’s mine.

I say Charge it,
Charge it,
Amex says they’ll sue,
I’ve become a credit engineer,
From Ebay vintage, to Tom Morris’ “Twisdom” on Amazon I find.

The first day Mastercard came to me,
Retail doors opened thought I’d never see,
Turned my credit rating into debris,

I said Charge it,
Ohh Charge it,
Buicks or thongs,
Can Charge it, and its mine.

All the things I could buy for Lee,
As if we were the bourgeoisie
Until 30 days it seems like free,
Until the bill is due.

Charge it,
Charge it,
Doesn’t all of mankind?
Is this new 10K teak table so wrong?
I just charged it, it was mine.

When the economy’s not strong,
I can charge it, and it’s mine.

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In addition to being a parody songwriter, Rick London is founder of Google’s #1 ranked offbeat cartoon, Londons Times.  He owns numerous funny gifts shops including Rick London Gifts which sell his licensed cartoon gifts on tees, mugs, etc. Along with his fiance’ Lee Hiller, they founded and operate a professional SEO and web design firm known as Pen And Ink Inc.

“Twitterville” Song Parody by Rick London to Jimmy Buffett’s “Margaritaville”

“Wastin’ Away Again In Twitterville” by Rick London c2009 (Song Parody to the tune of Jimmy Buffett’s Wastin’ Away Again in Margaritaville”

For My DF @LeeHiller

Twitterin’ for Twit’s sake,
Do I see a venomous snake?
Of which of our projects will they try to foil?
My followin’s on upswing,
Then Twitter’s porn sting,
I fall from 7,000 back down to two.

Chorus:

Networking away again in Twitterville,
Makin friends and avoiding assaults,
Some of them edit my RT’s, with their usernames,
Twitter promises it will come to a halt.

Wonder what is the reason,
Social networking all season,
Stuck like a honey-jar on Winnie The Poo
I found a real beauty,
An Oregon cutie,
And a love like hers is long overdue.

Chorus:
Finding my way around in Twitterville,
Friends like these just can’t be bought,
Some people searchin’ for money and fame,
And that stinks,
Hell, it’s a cyber-assault.

One actor’s show flopped,
She twitted it nonstop,
I think it was a sequel to “Romancing The Stone”,
No One to defend her
No box-office legal tender,
Could anything be worse than leaving Hollywood’s  “A”-List throne?

Chasin’ the nuts away in Twitterville,
Tryin’ to keep my friends that are earthy salt,
I wrote a quote that  a life-coach self-claimed,
How very lame; It’s my own damned fault.
Yes and some people say there’s a life coach to blame,
“Philosophy-lite” pay them its your own damned fault.

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Rick London is a writer and entrepreneur. He founded Londons Times Cartoons which has been Google’s #1 ranked cartoons and offbeat cartoon gifts since 2005. He owns several other net ventures as well. He is engaged to America’s Favorite Love Columnist, Lee Hiller. Follow them on Twitter. @RickLondon and @LeeHiller Together they founded the web design and ethical SEO team of PenAndInkInc.com

Cartoonist Rick London Writes “The Junk Food Song..Supersized” Sung To “Bette Davis Eyes”

“Supersized: The Junk Food Song” by Rick London C2009 To The Tune of Kim Carnes “Bette Davis Eyes

For my DF: Lee Hiller

Their arch is Harlow gold,
Deep grease with your french fries,
Big Macs trans-fat rancid and old
McDonald’s supersized.

A Happy Meal or two,
Will make you twice your size,
The size of Manhattan & Queens you’ll grow,
You too will be supersized.

Systolic at 192,
Diastolic 122
Enough cholesterol to make your face blue,
Whatever else is in it corporate stays hushed,
Want to know how to make your heart cry?
Try a box of Kentucky Deep Fried.

With belly so big your feet aren’t in sight,
From just some Popeyes’ chicken chewed to the bone
You’ve got pacydermic thighs.

Double Whopper for you,
Not one burger but twice till your arteries are goo,
Giving you Mt. Rushmore thighs.

Wendy’s you can’t fit into your shoes,
Ugg Boots no matter how hard you let your legs push,
Add on to that supersized fries,
You’ve got pacydermic thighs.

American Gotcha

Arby’s fruit turnovers tease you,
And your sweet tooth,
Cholesterol so thick needs Cardio peer review,
Blood pressure flies higher than a brown thrush,
And a nice salad bar to soften the lies,
For your pacydermic thighs.

Domino’s comes to you,
A poison menu,
A cheesy ballyhoo.
Not much nutritional guise.

Healthy food will repose you,
Your blood flows through,
Those organs are part of you,
Why not try healthy food on for size?

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Rick London is a writer and entrepreneur. His cartoon “Londons Times” has been the #1 ranked offbeat cartoon (Google rankings) since 2005. His website was founded in 1997 and has received over 8.5 million visitors since 2005. He founded Shoes That Amuse, the world’s only famous love quote shoes. He owns numerous funny gift shops bearing with gifts and collectibles bearing his offbeat cartoon images. He is the designer of actress Mariel Hemingway brand of licensed products. He is co-founder of PenAndInkInc an professional web design, branding and SEO firm which he founded with his fiancé’ Lee Hiller who is the love advice columnist of Herald de Paris.