Archive for the ‘education’ Category

Five Ways Online Retailers Can Survive The Summer (Beyond Twitter & facebook)

July 8, 2010

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There ain’t no cure for the summertime retail blues….or is there? Historically, retailers dread the

summer as far as sales are concerned. Some even close shop for long periods of time. I remember

one brick and mortar store that closed the entire summer. People just don’t want to go out

in the sweltering heat.

One might think that would be an advantage to the online retailer and in many ways it is, if he/she

wants it to be. People are still people and we are creatures of habit so we tend to sock away extra

funds to start buying in September through early December for holiday gifts.

There are ways an online retailer can help him or herself as well as clients by keeping up with

trends.

One might have to live on Mars to know that the economy is suffering; and, even then chances are

the news has saturated other planets. Face it folks, it’s rough.

But people still will buy gifts and collectibles. What can a retailer do to fill that void. My stores

decided to drop most of its items that retail for over $25 and focus more on items that run from

the $.99  to $15 range. Yes we still cater to those who prefer the more expensive gifts, but our

cartoon postcards,  buttons, magnets, and basic tees are shipped worldwide daily. The economy

has affected everyone  everywhere, but, if the retailer listens to what the customer wants, the

customer will buy.

With millions of online retail stores on the Internet, how does one become a squeaky wheel? There

are lots of ways to do so. I am doing one now by writing an article. But one can’t just write an

article and “they will come”. The article has to offer at least a few pieces of information of value to

both the retailer and client.

Many simply focus on Twitter, “talk” to “friends” and feel that does the trick. Same with facebook.

Both couldn’t be further from the truth. Backlinks are what drives people to ones site, and they

can,in fact be found on Twitter and facebook, if the member places them there, but also in articles

and article directories, blogs and blog directories, social bookmarking sites, pinging their blogs,

and  a multitude of other proven techniques that put the social marketer head and heals above the

basic Twitterer or facebook fanatic. I am not putting down those social networks. I use them

and do so successfully. I have just come to know they are not “magic” and if one puts all his/her

eggs in their baskets, they end up branding Twitter and Facebook more than they do themselves.

Some still use ppc (pay per click) advertising such as Google Adwords, MSN Search etc. They

can be very effective, and I used to use them, but with all the free opportunities to use backlinks

to ones shop, and even more specifically to a particular product, and even a place for keyword

tags, I see paid ads as becoming somewhat outdated. I could be wrong; but I’d prefer to write an

article or a blog with a backlink. It is free, and is another expense I don’t have (advertising) giving

me yet another reason to keep the prices lower to the end buyer.

If the idea of article marketing, tweaking or even changing your sites keywords and metatags,

pinging, twitter blasts, twitter scheduled regular tweets, facebook management, blog and web

upkeep boggles the mind, it is not only a good idea, it is mandatory to find a professional

affordable web promotion firm.

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Rick London is a cartoonist, writer, designer, and online retailer.  He founded Londons Times Cartoons in 1997.  It has been the #1 Google ranked offbeat cartoon since 2005 and MSN #1 ranked since 2008. London founded the world’s only famous love quote shoes, ShoesThatAmuse.com in 2007 which has been featured in USA Today and worldwide on the AP Wire. He owns numerous online shops featuring his #1 cartoon on funny tees, cards, mugs etc such as RickLondonCollection.com.  London owns the premiere SEO marketing firm with his wife Lee Hiller-London which offers affordable web promotion and design,   Pen and Ink, Inc.   He is a native of the Ms. Gulf Coast and donates a percentage of each sale to Gulf Wildlife and other animal causes.

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“12 Gauge Shotguns In National Parks” by Rick London (Sung to Chicago’s Saturday In The Park)

March 3, 2010

12-Gauge Shotguns In National Parks” (by Rick London c2010) to the tune of Chicago’s “Saturday In The Park)

Dedicated to my DF/Love Lee Hiller who has a petition to keep loaded firearms out of National Parks which will be presented to the President 7 Congress. Please take a few moments to sign it. CLICK HERE TO SIGN.

12 gauge shotguns now legal in National Parks,
Face to face or even drive-by
Loaded shotguns in National Parks
NRA asked & Obama complied.
Will you get pinged by a zooming missile zing?
A Dick Cheney wet dream.
A farewell to life song.
Eicay varee’, eisee’ nardee’,
Where’s my case of Schlitz? (belch)
The one packing heat is sublime
Do we need semi-automatics to keep the beavers damned?

Now we’re safe from dawn until dark,
Now we’re safe from butterflies, or chipmunks that are on the sly.
Noah sailed on his ark,
The animals were all his allies,
People always smiled in the valley of Hot Springs,
The new laws a bit too bizarre,
The human is the only species here that mauls,
Bring a sick bag before I hurl,
Quick duck there’s a bullet,
How will our furry friends act with this new slime,
In my yard gun play..whose gonna pay?

Sloe gin guzzlers will turn my forest into a roadkill cafe,
I never thought I’d be betrayed by my home, the USA.
Ol’ Chevy trucks riding mountains with dual exhausts,
All is fair game at our cost, crow or doe.

So get out of the park, before it gets dark,
It’s bound to light up like Fourth Of July.
No more funny days in the park,
Just our wildlife with a bullseye mark.
The park is our back yard,
But he’s sick and wants it, really wants it,
His gun is so phallic,
There’s long been a place in hell for those who commit this crime,

Please stay out of my backyard and keep your gun at home,

I might not be as nice as Nurse Ratchett. Can you dig it?

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In addition to being a parody songwriter, Rick London is a writer with over 600 published articles to his name, the founder of Londons Times Cartoons which has been Google’s #1 ranked offbeat cartoon since 2005 luring 8.6 million people to his site, and has opened numerous web shops featuring over 100,000 of his cartoon image funny gifts. He is also brand designer for actress/author Mariel Hemingway at Hemingway Collectibles.


“Gluten” by Rick London Sung To “Something” by The Beatles

November 16, 2009

Gluten” Parody Song by Rick London c2009
 To The Tune Of “Something” by The Beatles

                            Dedicated to my DF Lee Hiller whom I love. Also
                            dedicated to our true friend Mariel Hemingway who cared
                             enough to educate us back to a healthy lifestyle.



beatles  tall 3333

Gluten-Free Beatles

    Gluten's put in food so starch will be removed,  A Latin word for “glue” & try to recover,
 It has prolamins to give you celiac disease
   You could use a box of Blisscuits now,
      So you don't lose your entire Tao.

   No amount of advertising polyphonic prose 
   Nor even the finest restauranteur, 
   Gluten has enough hormones for a woman to grow goatees
  Than super-sized fries and a fast food cow

      You're wondering why my belly grows, 
  Wheat bread and vintage bordeaux, 
 You won't see me on #DWTS or other ABC shows, 
    My belly's grown, can't reach my toes. 

Lethargy so intense that I must doze, 
  Razputin & avacados at my next Super Wal-Mart shopping spree.
   Quit the hormonal Kentucky Fried fowl, 
     And mood swings that turn into black clouds..

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Rick London is an author, cartoonist and entrepreneur.
 He's been featured in The Wall St. Journal, ABC with
 Peter Jennings, CBS Morning With Paula Zahn,
 Bill O'Reilly, New York Daily News, Glamor Magazine,
 Playboy Magazine, PBS, NPR and many other media outlets.
 He is the founder and creator of Londons Times Cartoons
ranked Google and MSN's number one offbeat cartoon and
founder of Shoes That Amuse, the worlds only love quotation
shoes. He owns a number of cartoon stores that feature
 his images on over 100,000 products in such stores
as Rick London Collection and others. He and his fiance'
 Lee Hiller co-founded the full service web design
and seo firm Pen And Ink Inc,
and work together in the Ouichata mountains of Arkansas.
 Both are animal and nature lovers and active in both causes.
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I

Cartoonist Rick London Writes “The Junk Food Song..Supersized” Sung To “Bette Davis Eyes”

August 24, 2009

Supersized: The Junk Food Song” by Rick London C2009 To The Tune of Kim Carnes “Bette Davis Eyes

For my DF: Lee Hiller

The Real Bette Davis Would Have Avoided Fast Foods

Their arch is Harlow gold,
Deep grease with your french fries,
Big Macs trans-fat rancid and old
McDonald’s supersized.

A Happy Meal or two,
Will make you twice your size,
The size of Manhattan & Queens you’ll grow,
You too will be supersized.

Systolic at 192,
Diastolic 122
Enough cholesterol to make your face blue,
Whatever else is in it corporate stays hushed,
Want to know how to make your heart cry?
Try a box of Kentucky Deep Fried.

With belly so big your feet aren’t in sight,
From just some Popeyes’ chicken chewed to the bone
You’ve got pacydermic thighs.

A McDonald's Happy Meal?

Double Whopper for you,
Not one burger but twice till your arteries are goo,
Giving you Mt. Rushmore thighs.

Wendy’s you can’t fit into your shoes,
Ugg Boots no matter how hard you let your legs push,
Add on to that supersized fries,
You’ve got pacydermic thighs.

American Gotcha
American Gotcha

Arby’s fruit turnovers tease you,
And your sweet tooth,
Cholesterol so thick needs Cardio peer review,
Blood pressure flies higher than a brown thrush,
And a nice salad bar to soften the lies,
For your pacydermic thighs.
Londons Times Cartoons www.LondonsTimes.us
Domino’s comes to you,
A poison menu,
A cheesy ballyhoo.
Not much nutritional guise.

Healthy food will repose you,
Your blood flows through,
Those organs are part of you,
Why not try healthy food on for size?

——————————————————————————————–

Rick London is a writer and entrepreneur. His cartoon “Londons Times” has been the #1 ranked offbeat cartoon (Google rankings) since 2005. His website was founded in 1997 and has received over 8.5 million visitors since 2005. He founded Shoes That Amuse, the world’s only famous love quote shoes. He owns numerous funny gift shops bearing with gifts and collectibles bearing his offbeat cartoon images. He is the designer of actress Mariel Hemingway brand of licensed products. He is co-founder of PenAndInkInc an professional web design, branding and SEO firm which he founded with his fiancé’ Lee Hiller who is the love advice columnist of Herald de Paris.

Cartoonist Rick London Writes Beatles Parody Song “Diversity” To “Yesterday”

July 28, 2009

Yesterday” by The Beatles (Song Parody by Rick London. c2008) “Diversity”

beatles fine fine fine 9999999

Diversity,
Once other races seemed so far away,
Now together we work, socialize, and pray,
Oh the richness of diversity,

Bigotry,  Is for the ignorant who grins with glee,
We’re a land of white, black, Jew, Gentile, Moslem, Irish, French and Portuguese,
Diversity, is here for free,

America,
Must evolve, if not, will stay the same,
You’ll regret,
beatles album cover micheleHaving no swan song ’till you opt for diversity.
Diversity,
Regardless of one’s creed or race,
You may live a closed mind cabaret,
But you’ll long for diversity.

Every creed,
Every creed in the military, has risked its life for diversity,
Once misled,
I felt something wrong, it was that I longed for diversity.

Diversity,
All your hatred seems to drop away,
It’s a never-ending love buffet,
Oh, I believe in diversity.
Mm-mm-mm-mm.mm.mm.mm.

In addition to being a songwriter, London is founder of Google’s #1-ranked offbeat cartoon Londons Times & numerous funny gift shops including The Rick London Collection.