Archive for the ‘cartoons’ Category

Please, Leave BP (by Rick London) Sung To Please, Please Me (Beatles)

July 21, 2010

Please Leave Here BP by Rick London c2010 (Sung to Please, Please Me by The Beatles)

Dedicated To My Wife: Lee Hiller-London

What Bp’s done has made me want to hurl,
My Gulf now has no turrrrr-tles.
The whales are gone,
Please leave here BP, and take your crude.
Now to walk the beach we need haz-mat gloves,
. That you’ll begone,
Please leave here BP, and take your crude.

Now we get dispersement each time its rainin’,
Families & wildlife you have torn apart (torn apart),
Tourists stay home, they now have no reason,
It’s been that way, oh yea, since Deep Horizon blew.
Now your toxins are spreading round the world,
Into the Gulf’s currents they do swirl,
Please cease and desist, and take your crude.

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Rick London is a writer, cartoonist and designer as well as a parody song writer. He founded Londons Times Cartoons in 1997 which have become the #1 offbeat cartoon on the Internet. He also founded numerous funny gift shops featuring his cartoons on tees, mugs, etc. London is currently auditioning musicians/bands to record his parody songs (He has written 30 or so about BP). His goal is to write one per week until BP cleans up the entire gulf of oil and dispersement. He is donating his 50% of profits to Gulf causes.

A Londons Times (Panel Hollywood Series) Click To Enlarge

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Forward Of New Londons Times Cartoon Book By Philosopher Dr. Tom V. Morris

July 17, 2010

Why Cartoonists Shouldn't Drink (Click To Enlarge)

I was pretty sure I had arrived when America’s premiere (most brilliant)  philosopher Dr. Tom V. Morris, former professor of philosophy at Notre Dame for 2 decades, a Morehouse Scholar and founder of The Morris Institute Of Human Values asked me to write a review for the cover of his 21st book “Twisdom”, which I did.

So I knew I was taking a big chance when I asked Tom to write the forward for my first cartoon book “Our Favorites”  Londons Times Offbeat Cartoon Book celebrating our 13th Anniversary.

Here is what Tom wrote. I think it’s gorgeous. Thanks Tom……

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Dr. Tom V. Morris (Click To Enlarge)

I first met internet-wonder cartoon mogul Rick London, appropriately, on the internet, but more specifically, on Twitter. After several weeks of finding my way around that wild new world, a voice appeared in my Twitter Stream, a man with a strong, sparkling intelligence and a very good, finely warped sense of humor. I could depend on Rick to engage me with endlessly creative puns and inspire the same from me until the cows came in, and then I was sure he could concoct a cartoon about those cows that would be even funnier than the puns.

As a public philosopher, it’s my job to examine life, analyze the human condition, and comment about it all in ways that will raise people’s consciousness and perhaps provide new perspectives. Interestingly enough, that’s exactly what Rick, as a creator of cartoons, doesn’t except, he’s funnier. If Socrates had just learned to draw, or partnered up with a really good, offbeat illustrator, he might have been able to create and sell some books himself. And maybe then things would have ended a little better for him. It’s hard to poison someone who makes you laugh. One of the many hidden benefits of Rick’s job is that he doesn’t need a food taster or cupbearer to sniff out hemlock in his applesauce and white wine. The rest of us would rather slip in some vitamins to keep him going strong so he’ll be around for a very long time to continue to build his online cartoon empire.

The existentialists were on to something. Absurdity sells. The majority of Reality TV shows and most ongoing developments in contemporary politics prove this repeatedly. But intentional absurdity and revealingly funny absurdity that’s contrived to yield understanding is, of course, best of all. And that’s what we get in so many of the cartoons that Rick, as a creative Socratic midwife, has birthed over the years. An off kilter remark, or a creative juxtaposition, can evoke both a smile and an insight
in one quick moment.

Two of the deepest secrets to extraordinary success in life are creativity and collaboration. Rick lives them both, and his work shows the results. He is also a man of great kindness and personal loyalty and qualities that shine as brightly as his intellect, and are as rare as his philosophically prominent funny bone.

I heartily commend these pages to you. Laugh, think, and enjoy!

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Londons Times Cartoons Publishes 13th Anniversary Book

July 16, 2010

Founded in 1997 in a rural Ms warehouse, Londons Times has grown in 13 years to be one of the largest if not the largest inventory of offbeat cartoons on the Internet.

In 2005 Google ranked it the #1 cartoon where it has remained so ever since. In 2008, MSN also ranked it #1 and it remains so with MSN.

Today, on London’s 56th birthday, his first book “Our Favorites” was published, a compilation of what he considers his best cartoons from his collection into a picture book.

Founder Rick London says, “My wife Lee and I chose our favorite cartoons from our inventory. We decided to include 60 full page full color cartoons for the book, and create a series.

London continues to create cartoons with his Londons Times team and they appear on his main offbeat cartoons site

“BP Leaks” Song Parody To Rick James “Super Freak”

June 21, 2010

BP Leaks” A Song Parody by Rick London c2010 To The Tune Of Rick James’ “Super Freak”

Click To Enlarge

For my wife Lee Hiller-London

It makes me want to hurl,
BP comes not with frankincense and myrrh,
Tony Hayward said he was devastated hearing 11 men drowned
So BP puts dispersents in the oil and it swirls,
So we won’t see it when it hits the beach or land.
Now half the Gulf against BP has a writ
Most the beaches now are full of tar balls and grime,
Would you swim in anti-freeze?

(Refrain)


Are small people as important as their cash cow?
BP rigs leak,
The Gulf was once home to mullet, shrimp and trout,
Now brown goo is all that can be seen
Does Kevin Kostner hold the key,
Could James Cameron stop the leak,
We won’t know as BP will not concur
Deep Horizon was built upon deceit,
Now they should be read their legal rights,
For turning the Gulf into the Black Sea, yeah,
Because BP Leaks, Deep Horizon leaks,
The goo is leaking, yow
BP Leaks, BP Leaks,


Where oysters once made pearls,
And fish once laid their roe,
Now just seem like folklore,
The crap BP excretes,
Will take supertankers from Shell in the end, yeah,
It’s so obscene
Can we send them back to LondonTown?
We turn our hopes to the Prez,
Makes a small escrow with 3 years waiting
I turn on cable news and see the oil-drenched gulls,
Bp’s just obscene
(Refrain)
(Bridge)
Look around, no living things,
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh!


BP Leaks, It leaks,
That oil rig leaks.
Ohhhhh
It affects every boy and girl,
Every father and mother,
Our life has been beat by BP into th egroiund,
If you think they’re through with us small people, they’ll repeat for sure,
Another one blows, Dammit.

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Rick London is a native Gulf Coast writer, designer and cartoonist.  His goal is to write a parody song every week about BP until they stop the leak and clean up the mess.  A percentage of song and/or cartoon product sales benefits various wildlife causes.  This cartoon “A Tribute To Rick James” is available on his clothing line, aprons, tees, mouse pads, and much more at his RickLondonWear.com Cartoon Collectible Shop.  Londons Times Cartoons has been the number 1 offbeat cartoon on the web since 2005.

We’ll Make It Right (By Rick London c2010) BP Song

June 17, 2010

We’ll Make It Right by Rick London c2010 Song Parody To the Tune of Manfred Mann’s “Blinded By The Light”

We’ll make it right, does BP think we’re all douche bags, the tv ads are getting trite,
We’ll make it right, we know its a ruse, BP attorneys prepping for a fight.
We’ll make it right. Tell that to the pelicans that can’t move, or fish that died in their plight.

Incompetent riggers cause emotional triggers, BP said 1000 barrels a day. We smelled a rat.

Even Halliburton Told-er but BP was feeling bolder, then drilled deep into the ocean ground

Then in a warm Gulf summer breeze, 11 men were nowhere to be found

Even though BP said Deep Horizone was surely sound.

They broke every law,
Their spilling greasy juice to the Gulf Coast was such a blight,
We’ll make it right. They said dispersants would make such a pretty sight.
We’ll make it right. Drilled in spite of engineer’s red light.
We’ll make it right. I’ve got a nifty British accent so you know I’m so polite.

BP’s got 10-minute trained skimmers, to get the oil off our dinner. Now we fish from rivers & lakes

BP might hang around & do right what they’ve done wrong, after all 20 billion’s at stake,
But don’t start feeling sorry, they don’t have to borrow, 2 billion a month is their take,
So Want My Life Back Hayward was feeling kind of wayward, and acting like he was sure on our side,
But with baby blues a cryin’, I’m tellin’ you Tony’s lyin’, he’s about to take us for more of a ride,

They say we must be….
Blinded by their lies, while they rot our labor’s fruits in the middle of the night,
We’ll make it right.

Maybe if we’re lucky Shell or Conoco/Phillips
Will acquire BP, before they fall out of sight.
To clean up this toxic waste site.

—— guitar solo ——

Maybe its time we get out of the oil biz,
And look for alternative energies like coconut fizz
Plumes of oil are all ove The Gulf thanks to the BP plumes
Please make it clean again from Florida to Louisiana and good Ole Ms.
We’ve got an addiction to 10W30 & its making air dirty & you know we must be released,
There are no rehab clinics, we’ve got to bear and grin it, and get rid of the ugly beast.
The resources are there, hybrid cars from here to France, we just need someone to finance,
It sounds so forlorn to rely on oil from corn but someone’s gotta give it a chance,
It’s clean and safe and no oil to muck around.

BP said they……
Will make things right…..they’ll put a bandaid on it and get on a British Airways flight.
We will make it right. And if you believe us we’ll sell you a rig at Grand Isle late one night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
{the following two sections are sung simultaneously}

(7 Times)) ~ We will make it right.~Every grain of sand will be whiter than white
~ We will make it right,

2) ~Repeat 1st Verse

Any employee that squeals on BP will get fired

They’re using intimidation, fear and fright.

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Click To Enlarge

Rick London is a writer, designer and cartoonist.  He founded Londons Times Cartoons in 1997 which has been Google’s#1 ranked offbeat cartoon since 2005 and MSN’s #1 since 2008. Londons Times remains number one as do London’s offbeat cartoon gift shops.  London created this cartoon and manufactured about 40 products that can be purchased online. 10% of all sales benefit The Audobon Society and WWF.

“Twitter” Parody Song by Rick London c2010 To Tune Of “Money” Pink Floyd

March 10, 2010

For my Love/DF @LeeHiller

Pink Floyd Another Time, But We Still Love Them

Twitter, Play or Flay,
Midnight In The Garden Of Good & Evil On Monitor Display.
Listen, its not Ebay.

Twitter, answer before your browser crashes,
You could be labeled a non-response snob with no

MY D/F Love @LeeHiller (And It may sound funny, but she's gonna get her money back! A doo doo doo doo doo doo...

following or fans,

200,000 followers might be time to clean an extreme Twitter Stream,
Someone just RT’d me with the Hawaii 5-0 theme,

Danno got the money back
But not before someone hacked my Twitter profile,
Keep your hands off her stash CNN-Tech Guru, Uh oh, here comes a “Cap Attack”.

My honey, she got hit,
But she got right up from the mat,
And “the player” doesn’t know but he’s oon be laying flat.

We have this fidelity,
Boring pay our bills no debt,
A newspaper from Nepal asks me if “I have any regrets”.

The Nepal News

(Sax and guitar solos)

Tis the right seasonings, its about thyme,
See my fair @Lee
But don’t take a slice of that pie.

My honey, was at Ebay,
Is the Internet’s Dr. Eveel,
Now she has her own brand here to stay.

Twitters a great place 4 monthly lifetime ties,
If nothing else it proves that life’s unfair,
Piper must be paid,
A MidSummer’s Day,
A sewerage Day,
Or a Spiritual Bouquet,
Twitters here to stay.
A Salute to Ev and Biz,
We know them to be very bright and alright.

A Princess Shines At The Oscars (Our Kathy Ireland)!!!!


Biz & Ev Brainstorming At Twitter (So we'll be nervous)

One Princess at Oscars Red Carpet got a deliberate slight,
The princess gave a designer jewelry left hook & Governor’s Ball smashing blow & super high rankings (and had just help renew/rebuild lives in Haiti)… some nuts at keyboards are cruisin’ for a bruisin.
“Yeah!”
Whey do some forget to think,
I know, they are really drunk all of the time.
Why he wasn’t coming up on freely, after Lee was twittering in CAPS and
Screaming and telling him why he wasn’t coming up on freely.
It came as a heavy blow, but others to his surprise, will sort the matter out.

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Aside from being a parody songwriter Rick London is founder of the Internet’s #1 offbeat cartoon, Londons Times.  He also founded the world’s only famous love quote shoes, ShoesThatAmuse.com, and is a fashion brand designer for actress/author Mariel Hemingway Collectibles. Rick owns numerous licensed image cartoon collectible shops that sell tees, cards, mugs etc featuring his “out there” cartoons.

“Gluten” by Rick London Sung To “Something” by The Beatles

November 16, 2009

Gluten” Parody Song by Rick London c2009
 To The Tune Of “Something” by The Beatles

                            Dedicated to my DF Lee Hiller whom I love. Also
                            dedicated to our true friend Mariel Hemingway who cared
                             enough to educate us back to a healthy lifestyle.



beatles  tall 3333

Gluten-Free Beatles

    Gluten's put in food so starch will be removed,  A Latin word for “glue” & try to recover,
 It has prolamins to give you celiac disease
   You could use a box of Blisscuits now,
      So you don't lose your entire Tao.

   No amount of advertising polyphonic prose 
   Nor even the finest restauranteur, 
   Gluten has enough hormones for a woman to grow goatees
  Than super-sized fries and a fast food cow

      You're wondering why my belly grows, 
  Wheat bread and vintage bordeaux, 
 You won't see me on #DWTS or other ABC shows, 
    My belly's grown, can't reach my toes. 

Lethargy so intense that I must doze, 
  Razputin & avacados at my next Super Wal-Mart shopping spree.
   Quit the hormonal Kentucky Fried fowl, 
     And mood swings that turn into black clouds..

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Rick London is an author, cartoonist and entrepreneur.
 He's been featured in The Wall St. Journal, ABC with
 Peter Jennings, CBS Morning With Paula Zahn,
 Bill O'Reilly, New York Daily News, Glamor Magazine,
 Playboy Magazine, PBS, NPR and many other media outlets.
 He is the founder and creator of Londons Times Cartoons
ranked Google and MSN's number one offbeat cartoon and
founder of Shoes That Amuse, the worlds only love quotation
shoes. He owns a number of cartoon stores that feature
 his images on over 100,000 products in such stores
as Rick London Collection and others. He and his fiance'
 Lee Hiller co-founded the full service web design
and seo firm Pen And Ink Inc,
and work together in the Ouichata mountains of Arkansas.
 Both are animal and nature lovers and active in both causes.
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I

Iphone Song Parody Published by Rick London

October 26, 2009

Iphone” by Rick London Song Parody to the tune of “My Girl” by The Temptations

temptations

Iphone by Rick London c2009

Direct from Apple or even on Ebay,
Internet tethering..cut, copy and paste,
They took a survey,
Iphone or Blue-beraaa,
Iphone (Iphone, Iphone),
Talkin’ into my (Iphone) (Iphone).

I can have video or graphics in 3D,
On the Iphone You can tap or call to speak,
I like the GPS display,
My Iphone is here to stay,
Iphone (Iphone, Iphone),
Talkin’ into my Iphone (Iphone).

Bought it on Ebay,
Ebay,
Sold.

Now other cellphones are all the same,
Even my Motorola is such a shame,
New or refurbished on Ebay,
Surf with my tiny cyber bouquet,
Iphone (Iphone, Iphone),
Talkin’ into my Iphone (Iphone).

temptations iphone

Whether its business or video games to play,
On my Iphone.
My Iphone is here to stay,
My Iphone (fade)

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In addition to being a parody songwriter, Rick London is founder of Londons Times Cartoons, Google’s number one ranked offbeat cartoon

since 2005, and the Rick London Collection, another Google #1 ranking which features his cartoons on funny gifts and collectibles.

“Charge It” New Parody To Ray Charles “Georgia” By Rick London

September 10, 2009

Charge It” to Ray Charles “Georgia” Song Parody by Rick London c2009

dave_xray

For my Df @LeeHiller

Charge it, Charge it,
Even when my Visa bill’s due,
And I know it’s wrong,
But charge it, and it’s mine.

I say Charge it,
Charge it,
Amex says they’ll sue,
I’ve become a credit engineer,
From Ebay vintage, to Tom Morris’ “Twisdom” on Amazon I find.

The first day Mastercard came to me,
Retail doors opened thought I’d never see,
Turned my credit rating into debris,

I said Charge it,
Ohh Charge it,
Buicks or thongs,
Can Charge it, and its mine.

All the things I could buy for Lee,
As if we were the bourgeoisie
Until 30 days it seems like free,
Until the bill is due.

ray charles 2 piano winding

Charge it,
Charge it,
Doesn’t all of mankind?
Is this new 10K teak table so wrong?
I just charged it, it was mine.

When the economy’s not strong,
I can charge it, and it’s mine.

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In addition to being a parody songwriter, Rick London is founder of Google’s #1 ranked offbeat cartoon, Londons Times.  He owns numerous funny gifts shops including Rick London Gifts which sell his licensed cartoon gifts on tees, mugs, etc. Along with his fiance’ Lee Hiller, they founded and operate a professional SEO and web design firm known as Pen And Ink Inc.

“Twitterville” Song Parody by Rick London to Jimmy Buffett’s “Margaritaville”

September 8, 2009

“Wastin’ Away Again In Twitterville” by Rick London c2009 (Song Parody to the tune of Jimmy Buffett’s Wastin’ Away Again in Margaritaville”

For My DF @LeeHillerjimmy buffett

Twitterin’ for Twit’s sake,
Do I see a venomous snake?
Of which of our projects will they try to foil?
My followin’s on upswing,
Then Twitter’s porn sting,
I fall from 7,000 back down to two.

Chorus:

Networking away again in Twitterville,
Makin friends and avoiding assaults,
Some of them edit my RT’s, with their usernames,
Twitter promises it will come to a halt.

Wonder what is the reason,
Social networking all season,
Stuck like a honey-jar on Winnie The Poo
I found a real beauty,
An Oregon cutie,
And a love like hers is long overdue.

Chorus:
Finding my way around in Twitterville,
Friends like these just can’t be bought,
Some people searchin’ for money and fame,
And that stinks,
Hell, it’s a cyber-assault.

One actor’s show flopped,
She twitted it nonstop,
I think it was a sequel to “Romancing The Stone”,
No One to defend her
No box-office legal tender,
Could anything be worse than leaving Hollywood’s  “A”-List throne?
jimmy buffett cartoon parrot
Chasin’ the nuts away in Twitterville,
Tryin’ to keep my friends that are earthy salt,
I wrote a quote that  a life-coach self-claimed,
How very lame; It’s my own damned fault.
Yes and some people say there’s a life coach to blame,
“Philosophy-lite” pay them its your own damned fault.

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Rick London is a writer and entrepreneur. He founded Londons Times Cartoons which has been Google’s #1 ranked cartoons and offbeat cartoon gifts since 2005. He owns several other net ventures as well. He is engaged to America’s Favorite Love Columnist, Lee Hiller. Follow them on Twitter. @RickLondon and @LeeHiller Together they founded the web design and ethical SEO team of PenAndInkInc.com