Archive for the ‘film’ Category

Cartoonist Rick London Writes “The Junk Food Song..Supersized” Sung To “Bette Davis Eyes”

August 24, 2009

Supersized: The Junk Food Song” by Rick London C2009 To The Tune of Kim Carnes “Bette Davis Eyes

For my DF: Lee Hiller

The Real Bette Davis Would Have Avoided Fast Foods

Their arch is Harlow gold,
Deep grease with your french fries,
Big Macs trans-fat rancid and old
McDonald’s supersized.

A Happy Meal or two,
Will make you twice your size,
The size of Manhattan & Queens you’ll grow,
You too will be supersized.

Systolic at 192,
Diastolic 122
Enough cholesterol to make your face blue,
Whatever else is in it corporate stays hushed,
Want to know how to make your heart cry?
Try a box of Kentucky Deep Fried.

With belly so big your feet aren’t in sight,
From just some Popeyes’ chicken chewed to the bone
You’ve got pacydermic thighs.

A McDonald's Happy Meal?

Double Whopper for you,
Not one burger but twice till your arteries are goo,
Giving you Mt. Rushmore thighs.

Wendy’s you can’t fit into your shoes,
Ugg Boots no matter how hard you let your legs push,
Add on to that supersized fries,
You’ve got pacydermic thighs.

American Gotcha
American Gotcha

Arby’s fruit turnovers tease you,
And your sweet tooth,
Cholesterol so thick needs Cardio peer review,
Blood pressure flies higher than a brown thrush,
And a nice salad bar to soften the lies,
For your pacydermic thighs.
Londons Times Cartoons www.LondonsTimes.us
Domino’s comes to you,
A poison menu,
A cheesy ballyhoo.
Not much nutritional guise.

Healthy food will repose you,
Your blood flows through,
Those organs are part of you,
Why not try healthy food on for size?

——————————————————————————————–

Rick London is a writer and entrepreneur. His cartoon “Londons Times” has been the #1 ranked offbeat cartoon (Google rankings) since 2005. His website was founded in 1997 and has received over 8.5 million visitors since 2005. He founded Shoes That Amuse, the world’s only famous love quote shoes. He owns numerous funny gift shops bearing with gifts and collectibles bearing his offbeat cartoon images. He is the designer of actress Mariel Hemingway brand of licensed products. He is co-founder of PenAndInkInc an professional web design, branding and SEO firm which he founded with his fiancé’ Lee Hiller who is the love advice columnist of Herald de Paris.

Advertisements

“Alfred Hitchcock Presents” by Rick London c2008 To Tune Of “Sound Of Silence”

August 17, 2009

ALFRED HITCHCOCK PRESENTS” BY RICK LONDON (C2008) SUNG TO THE TUNE OF SIMON AND GARFUNKEL’S “SOUND OF SILENCE”

Dedicated to my DF Lee Hiller

hitchcock

In the darkness of my family den,
I was maybe no more than age ten.
Sunday night tv was slightly creepy,
Only one show as good as Rod Serling’s.
Television images that remain in my brain,
Bodily remains,
It was “Alfred Hitchcock Presents”

Unsolved murders and stalked damsels home alone,
Cemeteries showing bones, ,
Murder weapons that were legs of lamb,
Fatal seductions done by lovely vamps.
And in one Jimmy Stewart lost his balance due to fear of heights,
Marlene Deitrich seduced us in “Stagefright”.
And then Sunday’s “Alfred Hitchcock Presents.

In “The Birds” we saw sharp claws,
Tippi Hedrin was at such a loss,
And Jon Finch kept us in a “Frenzy” with loud barroom speaking,
But it was Bob Rusk bringing the mayhem.
In “North By Northwest” Cary Grant didn’t stand a prayer,
Did Eva Marie Saint care?
Then Sunday nights Alfred Hitchcock Presents.

In “To Catch A Thief” Grace Kelly did not know,
A few years later she’d be on the throne,
In “Torn Curtain” Julie Andrews was no peach,
Paul Newman felt he had much to teach,
In “Psycho” Norman Bates held the knife while Mother’s shower rained,
Hotel Bates they owned,
Then on Sundays Alfred Hitchock Presents.

In “Rear Window” Jimmy Stewart’s eyes on Grace Kelly lay
She was afraid,
In “Dial M For Murder” Ray Milland shows with no warning,
Grace Kelly inside while it was storming.
In “I Confess” behind the sacred curtains Montgomery Clift falls,
Where Anne Baxter crawls,
Then Sunday night “Alfred Hitchcock Presents”

———————————————————————————————————

Rick London is a writer and entrepreneur. He is founder of Londons Times Cartoons, the #1 Google-ranked offbeat cartoon since 2005.  He founded Shoes That Amuse, the world’s only famous love quote shoes.  He owns several funny gifts shops which feature his cartoons on funny merchandise. He is co-founder of SEO firm PenAndInkInc along with his fiance’, Lee Hiller who is also the love columnist of Herald de Paris. London lives in the Ouichata Mountains of Arkansas.